Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
How external is "for external use only"?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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