apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize