new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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