my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Boobs are out for the taking
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize