Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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