lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Randomize