When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize