I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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