I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
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I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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