low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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