It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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