so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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