What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
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Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
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We don't watch enough power rangers
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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