can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
When are your genitals available?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize