Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize