I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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