Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize