Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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