Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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