And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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