Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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