She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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