Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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