You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize