I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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