You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
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