Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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