He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize