How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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