just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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