i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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