Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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