he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize