Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize