i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
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