The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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