I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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