i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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