I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
zippers are such a cool invention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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