bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize