does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
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You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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