Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
this hospital has no fireball
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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