I CAN MOONWALK!
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize