WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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