You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
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It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
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She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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