I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
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well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
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I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I came so hard my ears popped.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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