the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
We got so high we made milksteak
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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