I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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