Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize