hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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